Food arrived on the table.  It all looks so yummy.  Everybody is ready to dig in. While everybody is having fun to dine together, you may want to follow some of the "rules" to show the respect.   I am going to share with you some of the important parts during the meal as the following subcategories: a) Utensils Usage b) Serving Food c) Eating d) Words Allowed & Prohibited Remember, these are some of the acts that you most probably do all the time while you dine out with your friends and family.  So, enjoy and have fun.	How to use the Chinese utensils?
a) Utensils Usage I believe that you know the Chinese use chopsticks. Other than that, they use spoons made of china, which are very different from the kind you use every day, and bowls. The Chinese don’t like making any noise out of these utensils, especially while they are eating. Some kids would like to use the chopsticks and hit the other utensils against each other just make it like playing drums or other kinds of musical instrument. That’s a No, No…..  If you try to use the spoon to get some food out of the plate, the food sticks so bad. NEVER, EVER hit the spoon against another utensil in order to get the food. Everybody in the restaurant will turn around looking at you. You don’t want to get into such kind of embarrassment, do you? There is a special way for holding chopsticks. They must be used in a pair. If you don’t know how to use them, don’t use them separately. Just ask the waiter/waitress to give you a fork and a knife. Your Chinese friends and relatives will totally understand.	Way to use Chopsticks
Other than chopsticks, Chinese use bowls for eating rice, plates for serving food, little sauce dishes for sauces and dips and little tea cups for tea. The way how to hold these utensils is also very important. Remember, never leave the bowl or tea cup on the table and bow down your head to eat or drink from it. ALWAYS pick it up. Don’t use the palm to hold the bottom part of any one of them either. Use the fingers to hold it. A lot of people make a mistake in holding a bowl. The correct way is to put your front part of the thumb on the edge of the bowl and leave the other 4 fingers to hold the bottom. I know you are going to ask me another question, “Why don’t the Chinese like using the palm to hold the bowl or other containers?”  To them, only beggars would do so.	Way to Hold Your Bowl
b) Serving Food All Chinese restaurants serve the dishes one by one instead of coming all in one shot like any western restaurants that you go to. And when they are brought over to the table, they will not be put in front of an individual, but in the middle of the table. Remember, even you see your most favorite dish coming, don’t make it purposefully to be put right in front of you. Chinese will only put a particular dish or the best one, in their opinion, in front of a person that they know he/she loves that food.
c) Eating Chinese always wait for everybody settling down on the table before start eating. The westerners always pass the dishes around the table when the meal starts. But the Chinese NEVER. What the Chinese do is to pick a piece or a portion from the dish of food whenever they want. ALWAYS get a reasonable portion of ONLY ONE dish.  When you are done with one kind, get another reasonable portion of another dish. Except in some special occasions, such as wedding dinner, Chinese always order the steamed white rice to go with the dishes. Some of them will order a bowl of plain congee. ALWAYS eat the dishes of food with rice or congee. Traditional Chinese taught their children to get the food from the plates which are the nearest to them. But now the society is more advance. If you step into the Chinese restaurants with 8 people or more, they will lead you to a table with a lazy Susan which makes it easy for everybody to get what they want. If the plates of food are being served on that platform and someone is taking the food out of the plate, let them finish doing so before turning it. One more thing, when you use your chopsticks or an extra pair provided by the restaurant for everybody to use, NEVER, EVER use them to turn the food over and look for your favorite part/portion of that particular plate. Pick the one which you see right away. Fish are the most popular dishes that the Chinese families order. It means luck. Plus, it is seafood which the Chinese treat as a kind of precious food. When it is served, it always comes as a whole with bones, head, tail and skin. Some restaurants will help customers to cut them into a few big pieces right in front of the customers. But by the time when half of the fish is gone, everybody still has the trouble to get the meat on the other side. ALWAYS Use the chopsticks and try your best to get the meat between bones. Let us take this same example, a plate of steamed fish, to tell you another important thing. A lot of Chinese love the soy sauce in the plate of fish. And I can swear to you. This kind of soy sauce tastes much different from the regular soy sauce that you always have. It is AWESOME. So, many of Chinese, including my family, love to mix the sauce with the steamed rice. In this case, this is fine. But do pay attention that you still eat other food from other dishes instead of just finishing up the rice mixture. Otherwise, you are telling the Chinese indirectly that you don’t like the food that they ordered. As I mentioned before, the Chinese don’t like making noise out of the utensils. So the same when they eat. Say like having soup, the Chinese don’t expect any noise while everybody is drinking soup. Even when you are chewing a piece of meat, no noise is allowed. However, Japanese likes to make noise when they eat noodles.  The action tells everybody that it is delicious.  This is for your reference just in case you run into a Japanese. In my family, it always happens to have 10-12 people sitting together on the same table having the meal in the restaurant. If the table is slightly smaller than usual, it should still be fine before the food is served. But then, when the meal starts and everybody is moving around, you may start feeling that there is not enough room for everyone, especially there is a spot saved for the waiter/waitress standing near the table and serving you guys. No matter what, remember that you come to have fun and nice time with everyone. Try your best not to stretch your arms too far. Occupy a space as small as you can so that you can allow more space for people on your both sides. Chinese have a special way to show their care, love and respect during the meal. Like every time when I go to visit my uncle in Rochester, he always like to pick some food and put into my bowl even I have been eating so much already. They do so because they want to show that they do care and respect you even they don’t know if you like that kind of food or already full or not. Try your best to finish it up as much as you can. Otherwise, they will take it as an offense. Moreover, when people put the food into your bowl, most of the time, they pick the best for you. Here are some examples to tell you what part of the plate is the best in the eyes of Chinese: Chicken, duck or other poultry: thigh, dark meat, parts with less fat and bones (but not breast) and well-cooked parts Pork, beef or other similar kind: a big piece of meat with less fat or bones Fish & sea foods: For fish, the cheek of the fish head, a big piece of meat with fewer bones or boneless. For sea foods, a big piece of meat with less shell Veggies (most of the time assorted vegetables): a piece of every kind. If there is only one kind, just a piece will be enough. Noodles/Fried Rice: Help people to fill up a little bowl. (Remember, if there are many people on the same table and the plate of noodles or fried rice is not much; just put the reasonable amount into the bowl. Or it will cause the others being upset or jealousy.) Soup and dessert: Restaurants always serve with these 2 in a big bowl. Either waiter/waitress or customers themselves will put into the little bowls to serve everybody. When someone is done for the first round, ask him/her if he/she wants some more. If yes, help them to get some. There will be the chance that the customers need to help themselves in dividing up the soup, noodles, fried rice or dessert. If this happens, as always, serve the elderly, the senior and the most respective people first.
d) Words Allowed & Prohibited You may be surprised that Chinese even pay attention of what should and should not say during the meal, huh? Actually, they just want to show the courtesy and respect to the others. And it is not difficult to learn. All you need to remember that Chinese and other Asians do not like to act, say or put up their emotions directly on their faces. Before ordering, as mentioned before, you need to ask everyone what they would like. And you may be asked the same question as well. If this happens, don't say that you hate or don't like certain kinds of food, except you are physically allergic to it. It is because this will make people think that you are so selfish that there may be someone on the table would like to have some. And they are not ordering the food just for an individual, but everyone. When the first plate of food came, they would say, "Hei Fai" which means "Pick up your chopsticks". In essence, it means "Let's start". During the meal, when you find the food is not as good as you think, do not say anything that you don't like it. In the rare case, the food has been ruined. Then, there will be someone else saying something, not only you. By the time you are done, never say, "Oh! I'm full". To the Chinese, you are affecting others appetite. Instead, just nicely tell those who are still eating, "Men men sik". It means, "Eat slowly", i.e. "Enjoy your meal".
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